It’s a classic.
The typical old granny whose cat whose name ALWAYS has to be Mittens is stuck on top of a tree.
Last session we just felt like goofin’ around and doing useless things away from the main storyline.
One of the things that happened that session involved this typical scenario described above.
“What seems to be the trouble madame!?!?!?!?” My player asked, all too eager to perform the most mundane of heroic activity for minor benefits of minor proportions. (or so he thought)
“Oh great hero! Please it is most troublesome! My pet Mittens has gotten himself stuck on top of this tree! You must save him!” said the troubled grandma.
“FEAR NOT CITIZEN! I AM ON THE CASE!” Said my player.
I then describe how his character looked up to gauge the height of the tree.
How his head kept looking higher… And higher… And higher… And higher up…
It turns out… This mission isn’t as simple as it seems…
That tree… IS OVER 500 feet of height!
Climbing that thing… Will be a challenge of epic proportion! And suddenly falling down mid climb… Could result in death!
“Oh.”
I was trying to discourage the players to stop this nonsense… They’ve been doing this for about a whole 5 days of in game time of just performing mundane hero activities, and I kinda want them to move forward with the plot.
Their next mission is their final one, with them facing after the final boss… This is no time for a pointless filler arc! What is this!? A Shounen Battle Anime???
“I’m gonna do what’s called a pro gamer move.” Said my player as they call another player, the one with an axe. “What are you doing?” I ask. “See this Axe?” Said the player.
"I’mma use this as an impromptu climbing gear and climb the tree using it.
…
“Sure… I give. Just roll for might to climb or something.”
Not what I expected someone with an axe would do when trees are involved.
They rolled a 43.
“It was a long and difficult climb but at long last, your character reaches the top and grabs the kitten and climbs back down… Safely. The granny thanks you for your troubles and leaves you with not even a cent to spare.”
With nothing bad happening, I presume they’ll keep doing this for the entire duration of their 1 month of downtime before the final fight.
Oh boy…
At this point there should be plenty of questions.
Like why is there a huge tree in the middle of this city that we’ve never seen before?
How did that cat get up there?
But my players can’t be bothered.
They want to keep going on these side trips in hopes that doing enough of them, I’ll give them ONE MORE level before the final fight.
I… I won’t…
Not when you’re doing things like that!
They’re like level 9 now, and the only way they can possibly turn level 10 now… Is the final fight! Nothing else!
